๐ Introduction
Many women dream of marriage, family, and motherhood.
Yet the reality of raising children, managing a household, and balancing personal expectations can feel very different from what they imagined.
Feelings of loneliness, frustration, resentment, emotional exhaustion, and even thoughts of divorce often arise when expectations and reality collide.
Some people try to fill that emptiness through shopping, travel, entertainment, or other distractions. But despite temporary relief, the dissatisfaction often returns.
This meditation testimonial shares the story of Kyung-ok S., a homemaker who struggled with anger, irritation, marital conflict, and unhappiness after becoming a wife and mother.
Although she appeared to have a normal family life, internally she felt trapped, lonely, and burdened by resentment.
Through meditation, she discovered the root causes of her suffering and gradually transformed her relationships with her husband, daughter, and even herself.
Her husband once called her a “witch.”
Today, he calls her an “angel.”
๐ฌ โMy Husband Used to Call Me a Witchโ
By Kyung-ok S. | Homemaker
Only three months after getting married, I became pregnant.
Because I was not mentally prepared to become a mother yet, both my body and mind struggled tremendously.
My baby barely slept, cried constantly day and night, and little by little my entire life became centered around childcare.
The burden of raising a child kept growing heavier.
I wanted freedom, but I felt trapped in a life where I constantly had to care for someone else.
Back then, my husband used to call me a “witch” because I was always irritated, angry, and snapping at everyone.
Today, he tells me:
โYou’re an angel. Where did your wings go?โ
That is how much my life changed.
๐๏ธ Shopping and Traveling Could Not Fill the Emptiness
My heart always felt empty.
To escape that feeling, I went shopping almost every day.
The things I bought simply piled up at home inside unopened shopping bags.
Whenever I felt frustrated, I traveled constantly with other mothers.
I traveled throughout Korea and even overseas.
While traveling, my heart briefly felt lighter.
But the feeling never lasted.
No matter where I went, the dissatisfaction followed me.
Even though my husband was actually a kind person, I disliked him for no clear reason.
I wanted a divorce badly enough that I even joined online divorce communities.
Because my husband traveled frequently for business, he often missed holidays, family gatherings, and special occasions.
I felt as though I was raising our daughter completely alone.
As a result, I constantly directed irritation, anger, complaints, and emotional outbursts toward him.
Naturally, he began coming home later and later.
And eventually, he started calling me a “witch.”
๐ I Wanted to Live Like a Princess
When I began practicing meditation, I was finally able to see myself objectively.
What I discovered surprised me.
Deep down, I had been living like a princess.
I wanted to appear delicate.
I wanted to be cared for.
I wanted life to continue revolving around me just as it had before marriage.
But reality was different.
And that gap between expectation and reality was the source of my suffering.
Before marriage, I had never done household chores.
I rarely cleaned.
I rarely washed dishes.
Even carrying a handbag felt burdensome to me.
Yet after marriage, I suddenly found myself responsible for an entire family.
Deep inside, I constantly felt that I was the one sacrificing.
I believed:
โI’m the only one suffering.โ
โI’m the only one doing everything.โ
That was why I resented my husband.
But as I reflected more deeply, I realized something painful.
My husband had quietly stood beside me all along.
He had been working hard for our family every day.
I simply had never noticed.
As I continued practicing meditation, I often sent him text messages saying:
โThank you.โ
โI miss you.โ
โI’m sorry.โ
โI was wrong.โ
๐ Learning How to Become a Real Wife and Mother
My daughter changed my life as much as my husband did.
Looking back, I realized that I had treated her harshly.
I believed children had to be strictly controlled.
I scolded her often.
Sometimes I even hit her.
When she asked me to play with her, I would tell her:
โGo play by yourself.โ
I convinced myself that she enjoyed playing alone.
But one day I realized the truth.
She played alone because nobody was playing with her.
I had chosen my own comfort over spending time with her.
That realization broke my heart.
As I continued meditation, I slowly began understanding what it truly meant to be a wife and a mother.
The fixed ideas and selfish expectations I carried started disappearing.
For the first time, I began seeing my husband and daughter as they truly were.
Naturally, the way I spoke began changing as well.
Instead of saying:
โEat.โ
or
โWhy are you late?โ
I started saying:
โI made something delicious. Come home early.โ
Instead of demanding:
โTake out the trash!โ
I would simply say:
โI’ll take care of it.โ
Something unexpected happened.
As I changed, my husband changed too.
He began helping with dishes.
He helped clean the house.
He packed our daughter’s school bag.
And he started coming home earlier.
๐ โYou’re an Angelโ
One day, my husband called me outside our apartment building.
That was unusual by itself.
Then he said something I will never forget.
โYou’ve become such a kind person.โ
โOur family feels peaceful now.โ
โYou’re an angel.โ
โWhere did your wings go?โ
I was speechless.
The man who once called me a witch was now calling me an angel.
And for the first time, I realized how much our family had changed.
๐ฉโ๐ง Our Daughter Changed Too
My relationship with my daughter improved tremendously.
In the past, we argued constantly.
Sometimes both of us cried from exhaustion.
If she ran around the house, I would immediately yell at her.
Now I calmly explain things.
And because I speak gently, she listens.
Sometimes she leaves handwritten notes on my vanity table that say:
โMom, I’m sorry for being loud.โ
โI love you.โ
She hugs me often now.
She smiles more.
And for the first time, I truly feel our family becoming one.
๐ฟ Home Became My Favorite Place
In the past, I constantly thought:
โIf I do this much, they should do the same for me.โ
Now I simply enjoy giving love.
And surprisingly, that alone brings me happiness.
I also realized how much I had hurt my own parents through years of complaints and resentment.
Thinking about them now fills me with gratitude.
Since beginning meditation, my heart has remained peaceful and full.
Originally, even simple tasks overwhelmed me.
Today, I confidently work outside the home as well.
I no longer complain about carrying heavy bags.
I rarely go shopping.
I rarely travel.
Not because I cannot.
But because I no longer need those things to feel happy.
Home itself feels like a place of rest.
A place of comfort.
A place of joy.
Daily life no longer feels repetitive or burdensome.
Every day feels new.
Every day feels meaningful.
And every day feels full of gratitude.
Sometimes I think about the person I used to be and quietly laugh.
Because I never imagined that simply changing my mind could change my entire life.
